Wednesday, February 19, 2014

M2C Week 5: #Beneficial



Permissible But Not Beneficial

 
I've written about this a few times during this M2C OBS in my journal.  The first time that I got 3 chapters into Made to Crave, this was the scripture that spoke to me immediately.  And it still does.  I write it on post-it notes, it is on my calendar, I even set it as the background on my phone once.  It is a simple reminder that I can do (or eat) anything that I want but that doesn’t mean that it is good for me.

But a few weeks ago I had an epiphany.  This goes much further than this is good and that isn’t good.  It is different for each one of us.  What is ok for my hubby is NOT ok for me.  He can eat nearly anything he wants, but it sends me down the wrong path.  It sets of a series of events that is not healthy for me.  It takes me further away form the one and only God that can give me what I need to survive.  Did you see that, survive.  I promise, I'm trying not to be overly dramatic.  But the reality is that food is my struggle.  Food is what I need to overcome.  And the only way that I can do that is to recognize four very important truths.  

1) I cannot do this alone.  While I have a great support team at home, it is the support team in my heart that I need more.  Face it, there will always be that super-yummy-instantly-satisfying-food that everyone is eating.  Everyone but me. And I am going to need God's strength and grace to turn away from it.  Because once I eat that one delicious piece of cake covered in icing, I will get another. Which rounds me back to right now, that stuff is not beneficial for me and the next truth.

2) Just because everyone else is getting it, I don't.  God isn't doing this to punish me (although I have had my doubts about that).  To be honest, I don't really get it, in my heart.  I'm still working on it.  What I do know in my head is that just like I put boundaries on my kids and my students, for two very good reasons, to keep them safe and to help them mature, God has set these boundaries for me.  To protect me, not to cage me (oh, this is a hard one for me to take in).  And to help me mature past my desire for instant gratification (yeah, I get on people all the time about this, but have never taken the time to apply it to me in the one place that I struggle most).

3) This is not going to be easy. 'Nuff said.

4) While I need food to survive in the bodily sense, I need God to survive spiritually and eternally. If my body was to give out before I finished this sentence, there is a part of me that will continue on.  I need to worry more about nourishing that part of me and not the fleshy part.  I like the way that 1 Corinthians 10:23-24 was put in the Message translation. "Looking at it one way, you could say, “Anything goes. Because of God’s immense generosity and grace, we don’t have to dissect and scrutinize every action to see if it will pass muster.” But the point is not to just get by. We want to live well, but our foremost efforts should be to help others live well."  And there it is again my friends.  See what I put in bold AND italics.  I was made for more!

The reality of this is the more I say this "permissible, not benifical" each time I want something that I already know I shouldn't have it gets a itsy-bitsy-tiny-whiny-little-bit easier.  And when I don't, I get just that much more defeated and discourages (and a little bit of a pity-party starts to happen).  I just don't know why it has taken me all this time to figure this out.  But I am glad that I finally did.  When did it finally sink in for you?  What were your epiphanies?

2 comments:

  1. Great post, So honest and really straight from the heart. I realized that it really is almost impossible to be on this journey without being a part of a community and without being accountable to somebody who is not afraid to be brutally honest with you . You are so right about being more concerned about nourishing the part of the body that will be eternal and I need to really work on that so that I can walk in that prosperous place God has prepared for me. Thanks Kerri, I needed this message today.

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  2. Hello! Great post!! I LOVE lists! Makes things easier to process :) There were 2 statements that really stuck with me in your post today: "it is the support team in my heart that I need more." and "I need to worry more about nourishing that part of me and not the fleshy part." So true for both! Thanks for these reminders. They have truly been #Beneficial :)
    Katrina Wylie (OBS small group leader)

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